Kookocracy

[Octagonal]

Goat boat out bomby wearing green budgies and nothing else, he was copping from nearly every soul out.

[Beanpole]

Two Swedish backpacker mates, entering the fray at an already crowded Bondi at about 4'. Both had identical brand new minimals, first time wet, paddling out side by side, close enough to rub shoulders. At each incoming wave they would ditch the boards, dive under the wave, surface, untangle their leashes and boards, climb back on and keep paddling.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhrggggggggggggg,Summer on the way. Time to put the board away and go esky lidding in the flags

[Karlos]

What I want to know is, how the hell the Aquabumps guy's shots often make Bondi look good when the conditions are actually rubbish? I've not looked at his site, but often when his shots appear on RS, they really contradict the reports. Hmmmm…

[max]

The numbnuts who take their leashes off after a surf, and..I mean WTF for ? Is it so others may think you have a magnificent quiver of boards at home or in back of the ute? ...you know who you are dingbats, thing is some of you can actually surf, but you cannot stand up straight cos your heads are so big. Wear sunscreen.

[Beerfan]

Man, i would say i fit the profile of kook exactly. minimal, surfing for 12 months ( nearly ! ). BUT, i stay out of the way, and dont kid myself by taking on bigger or dodgier than i can handle. It's easier down here ( the gong ) because midweek early, there's no one around to get in the way of. Not all kooks get in peoples way, or do stupid stuff.


Sticking up for the ( apparently ) minority of kooks who do the right thing!

Mark

[kreepykrawly]

There are kooks and there are KOOKS. When you start surfing your called a kook.This refers to tadpole surfers that have got NO idea because they lack experience.
Now the problem is not these surfers generally(unless they surf crowded popular locations and pose a risk to everyone.
The real problems in todays surfing society are the KOOKS .These individuals have gone through the learning cycle,gained some experience and still act like they have got NO idea about anything.No respect,no idea about how to rock up at a car park that your not a local of,no idea on paddling attitude,no idea about board carrying techniques ,no idea about surf positioning and no idea about bloody anything.
Personally i think its a upbringing thing.Somewhere down the track mum n dad wasn't there for them.

[scroopulis]

Some of the biggest KOOKS i've met are bloody good surfers.

[rmshapes]

I found one of the leaders of the new kookacracy the other day out at Pelo's. My mate, a 51 yo longboarder, who happens to be one of the only longboarders I can actually watch around here without cringing, gets the wave of the session. He takes off and pigdogs into a nice section while hooting. As he hoots, the only other person near him yells out "cu/nt!" So Frank, the longboarder (who shortboards as well) paddles back out and asks, " What did you say?" And his reply was "You're a cu/nt for claiming that wave." to which Frank retorts, " Aren't I allowed to have any fun out here?"

So this twat from Blue Bay (kook central), procedes to tell Frank how "hardcore he is because he's 41 and still rides a 6'1". Then goes on a tirade because Frank is American and " You are from the most hated culture in the world. Yadda Yadda Yadda." So, needless to say, Frank put him in his place, choosing his words wisely.

We surf at Pelo's pretty much daily (if it's on - and have for the past 7 years) and I've never witnessed such hatred there - ever. We get along with the bodyboarders and all the regulars there. Probably because we can surf, have fun and keep our mouths shut. But this kook, from Blue Bay, who we see for the first time a few days prior (ruining heaps of good waves by the way), thinks he's an instant local (just add water) and can start shit out there. News flash - there are no locals at Pelo's - it's in the middle of a goddam National Park - f*ckwit.

So I'm nominating him Kook of the Week. If he ripped, I might cut him some slack but he's an arm flailing, style-less kook with just enough ability to hassle you out. The guy seriously pissed me off.

[moreorless]

The existence of entire internet forums (surfer mag, swaylocks) devoted to discussing and extolling the virtues of slab-like keel fishes, bonzers and other assorted surfing detritus again, as if they were some sort of inspired wisdom handed down from our surfing ancestors

Why stop there collnarra? What about the existence of forums like the ones on Realsurf - places where everyone is more or less equal even if they only arrived yesterday?

What about surf forecasting websites? Now everyone is an instant expert when it comes to predicting the next killer swell.

What about the surf media in general?

In an age of mass and instantaneous communication are people like Don and Ben, and maybe even Nick, the Lords of the Kooks?

[WANDERER]

I found one of the leaders of the new kookacracy the other day out at Pelo's. My mate, a 51 yo longboarder, who happens to be one of the only longboarders I can actually watch around here without cringing, gets the wave of the session. He takes off and pigdogs into a nice section while hooting. As he hoots, the only other person near him yells out "cu/nt!" So Frank, the longboarder (who shortboards as well) paddles back out and asks, " What did you say?" And his reply was "You're a cu/nt for claiming that wave." to which Frank retorts, " Aren't I allowed to have any fun out here?"

So this twat from Blue Bay (kook central), procedes to tell Frank how "hardcore he is because he's 41 and still rides a 6'1". Then goes on a tirade because Frank is American and " You are from the most hated culture in the world. Yadda Yadda Yadda." So, needless to say, Frank put him in his place, choosing his words wisely.

We surf at Pelo's pretty much daily (if it's on - and have for the past 7 years) and I've never witnessed such hatred there - ever. We get along with the bodyboarders and all the regulars there. Probably because we can surf, have fun and keep our mouths shut. But this kook, from Blue Bay, who we see for the first time a few days prior (ruining heaps of good waves by the way), thinks he's an instant local (just add water) and can start shit out there. News flash - there are no locals at Pelo's - it's in the middle of a goddam National Park - f*ckwit.

So I'm nominating him Kook of the Week. If he ripped, I might cut him some slack but he's an arm flailing, style-less kook with just enough ability to hassle you out. The guy seriously pissed me off.

Blue bay... pffft says it all!

I love pelo, its abundance of waves and lack of aggro... hope it doesnt change anytime soon.

[WANDERER]

In an age of mass and instantaneous communication are people like Don and Ben, and maybe even Nick, the Lords of the Kooks?

in short; yes.

[Nick Carroll]

Some of the biggest KOOKS i've met are bloody good surfers.

Good point there scrofulous.

What's a Kook? Unlike ol' kk, I don't think a beginner is a kook. I think a kook is generally somebody who behaves as if he's a lot further up the food chain than he actually is. A kook doesn't know he's a kook.

I've been a bit facetious in this thread...to tell the truth I get a kick out of seeing a greater democracy spread through surfing. It's given a few sacred cows a milking they've long deserved (including those in my own area of work, the surfing media).

But it has its downsides, and one -- potentially at least -- is that flattening-out of the idea of the surfer...a kind of elevation of mediocrity. If 75% of the nation's surfers aren't much good, yet they're the driving force behind trends in the sport, then where does the sport go?

[ric_vidal]

If 75% of the nation's surfers aren't much good, yet they're the driving force behind trends in the sport, then where does the sport go?

They follow the rest of the herd. Baaa, baaa...

[austeve]

Gotta agree there smmntl.That would have to be the height of commercialism & the "Look at me" wanker culture

[bonusbeats]

...Haven't seen one yet, but for me the most hideoous omen of an emerging kookocracy will be the first guy in the lineup with a waterproof iPod. I mean, I'm as cynical about the whole soul surfer thing as the next hippie-killer, but we all draw the line somewhere, and for me the iPod in the water is just a fking abomination.

@"Why surf on mute?"

i'm pretty sure i saw a person waering headphones on sat at tamarama. guy on a rescue board.

ps. sorry about the crap metaphor before.

[Nick Carroll]

In an age of mass and instantaneous communication are people like Don and Ben, and maybe even Nick, the Lords of the Kooks?

If I'm a KookLord, what are you?

Like I said buddy, to avoid being a Kook, you gotta know what you are.

[bombora]

Another specific: Top of the line, latest model EXPENSIVE Beemers, Mercs, Saabs etc etc etc FILLING the beach carpark. All with racks, almost all with mals/minimals on top. Hard to spot the trad rusted out station wagon. No envy here, if ya got the dosh do with it what you want. But it is an example of kook kingdom 30-40-50 somethings either returning after decades dry, or newbies. And these are the "entitlement" peopel I was talking about earlier.
And I often work, in the city, on Sundays; driving up Pittwater then Military Rds I pass a seemingly endless procession of same said cars heading north to their playground in the sun.
And what's with the bloody huge long silver travel board covers they slip their mals into. A mal should have one fin, no leggie and a decent glass job, it should be able to handle the intense rigours of taking it from your Mosman garage to you Merc roof racks to the beach carpark without serious damage. Oh yes, it's such a pain removing wax from the roof of your pricey European set of wheels.
I feel better now. Think I'm vented out.

[Chong]

If the average surfer wants a confronting yet educational reality check on where they fit into the whole food chain scenario I suggest doing what myself and 2 mates did and book a weekends coaching with Martin Dunn. In one swift session the realisation that you have a LOT to learn when it comes to riding waves is incredibly humbling. All of a sudden you realise your arms are wrong most of the time, or that you don't look where your going when doing cutties or that you have an upright stance, or that you don't compress when landing reos. Martin was the consummate professional and didn't destroy our egos too much but man 2 days with him and you realise that A) good surfing for the average surfer is a life time goal and that B) The gulf between todays pros and average surfers is grand canyon size and that C) potentially you may have been perpetuating some flawed technique for the majority of the time (14 years) spent pursuing this sport. I think the money I spent did more to potentially aid in some kind of skill and style increase over the next few years than any normal surf trip.