urge to poo when suiting up

[marcus]

g'day all
Is it just me, but as soon as i pull up in the car near the ocean and get ready for a surf i get the urge to do a pre-surf poo.
My other half is perplexed by this, she thinks the smell of the ocean or something is having an effect on me.
does this happen to anyone else?

also, anyone notice that the surf club toilets usually don't have toilet seats, just a plain rim.
and you put pieces of paper around the bowl rim and just as your about to sit down, the wind blows under the door and blows the paper off.

[oldman]

Dear Marcus,

Your body is preparing itself for a bit of hard work, and the anticipation often provides a small adrenal surge beforehand to get you ready for it. It's all part of the fight of flight syndrome that is genetically programmed into you, and one of the things that happens is that your body anticipates the challenge and sends out a message to 'drop everything' so that you can get away more quickly.

However your story of placing t-paper around the rim of the seat is really quite pathetic. This is a girly manoevre, and no self-respecting man should ever do it, or worse, admit to it.

[marcus]

However your story of placing t-paper around the rim of the seat is really quite pathetic. This is a girly manoevre, and no self-respecting man should ever do it, or worse, admit to it.

well i have tried using the wetsuit pulled down as a buffer.
(hey wait a sec, are you saying you plant your ass straight down on a public dunny rim???)
have tried bending over so as not to touch the bowl and blew out the back over the wall.
sorry to the cleaner at sandon point

[bumfluff]

Try hovering over the rim. Just dont forget to ummm aim.

[purple pyramids]

i have developed an association between the smell of cancer council suncreen and rocking off at tama in 15" surf. so now the desire to poo appears whenever i apply the stuff, regardless of proximity to the ocean.

[bumfluff]

i have developed an association between the smell of cancer council suncreen and rocking off at tama in 15" surf. so now the desire to poo appears whenever i apply the stuff, regardless of proximity to the ocean.

Fascinating...

[oldman]

i have developed an association between the smell of cancer council suncreen and rocking off at tama in 15" surf. so now the desire to poo appears whenever i apply the stuff, regardless of proximity to the ocean.

You hve developed a pavlovian response PP.

(hey wait a sec, are you saying you plant your **** straight down on a public dunny rim???)

I know, it's just an amazing breakthrough isn't it marcus. Unless the rim is covered with other people's doings, I am so brave that I will do it.

However, to clarify, when I am seated, it is not my arse on the rim, but my supporting legs, with my arse situated roughly in the middle of the bowl. And guess what, unless the skin that is touching the rim is already cut and/or infected, no amount of germs are going to harm you. This is what skin is for.

And then you go for a surf for an hour or two in salty water. For your peace of mind marcus, salt water kills bacteria as effectively as soap and water. It's just like taking a bath.

So sit in peace.

[Cpt.Caveman]

I never thought I'd read the counseling of how to use toilets properly on RS...

I feel wiser for knowing now, and quietly content....

[FishStick]

i have developed an association between the smell of cancer council suncreen and rocking off at tama in 15" surf.

I know this winter has been a bit bad but I didn't realise we are now measuring surf in inches!

As for needing to drop the 'Cosbys off at the Pool' it's mind over brown matter. I go when I want and not when it wants. I've been like that all my life, although I did get bunged up once when I was a kid.

[Grooter]

I find this happens to me all the time.

In fact I usually have to take a good sh.it before heading off from home. Don't know why but it's like clockwork.

And if I never do it then I'll pay for it later. Nothing worse than being tense knowing you need to drop your guts as a clean up set is coming on the horizon, just makes you more anxious and tense

Many an aqua bog has been required in the past as a result of this situation. Although perversely I like the feeling of doing one, it really refreshes the date and the sense of relief is relaxing and calming.

[JET01]

My random urge to poo doesn't come during surf time... It always hits me at the video shop.
As soon as i walk in and smell that popcorn it hits me... then it's a mad rush to pic a dit and get out of there in time so i don't mud myself.

[Animal_Chin]

I've heard legends of the infamous 'line-up chikito'.

How the fark do people actually lay a cable whilst surfing? ie strip down the wettie, push the board a safe distance away and get a poo out????

[bookster]

Remember a mate of mine did just that in winter, one of his nuggets made its way into the sleeve of his wetsuit... nasty

[Grooter]

I've heard legends of the infamous 'line-up chikito'.

How the fark do people actually lay a cable whilst surfing? ie strip down the wettie, push the board a safe distance away and get a poo out????

Practice my son. Practice

[bohdidontsurf]

I have got to say poo humor is not normally my thing usually but there have been some classic lines here ... "taking the cosbys tongue pool" is fcuking hilarious .. I was thinking last night how glad I am that I don't suffer from this affliction however today I went for a wave at my local and not 20 seconds after I suited up the bear announced it was about to come out of the cave ... fcuk me I said .. those pricks on realsurf have jinxed me .. so knock kneed I tip toed to the council toilets and to my delight I saw a spotlessly clean stainless steel shitter WITH A SEAT .. sure it wasn't heated or puffed a little cloud of glen 20 as I perched my ass on it but atleast I avoided parking my rear on the ice cold rim ... god bless Gosford coucil

[marcus]

ancient related threads
http://forum.realsurf.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=392
time for an up date on this topic
http://forum.realsurf.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=245

[Regnis]

My housemate always needs to do a poo before any surf he has..can be pretty frustrating having to wait around for him on a cold winters morning.

However, i often get a good laugh from paddling out at the point and turning around to see this 105kg ape (he's a pretty hairy man) laying cable under the trees on the hill.

whilst on the issue, i used to have to always do a shit before pulling cones when I was a youngster. was just my thang

[oldman]

whilst on the issue, i used to have to always do a shit before pulling cones when I was a youngster. was just my thang

The knowledge that I am about to indulge still has that effect on me regnis.

Dunno how people do it in steamers? You've got a lot of wetsuit flapping around in the water there and unlimited scope for taking those grogans back with you.

Have never tried that one. I am sure it would lead to me drowning, with half a turd hanging out and wetsuit flapping about, entangling me and taking me down.

To be followed by front page news in the Telegraph.

I would definitely make for solid ground before trying that on. The shame heaped on your family would be too much to bear, even if already dead.