Search found 1993 matches

by offshore1
Sun Jul 22, 2018 11:50 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

Looks better than Wales.
by offshore1
Sun Jul 22, 2018 9:39 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

crabmeat thompson wrote:
Sun Jul 22, 2018 8:00 am
4th day in a row of abject, unsurfable flatness. the road is calling me. might load up the van and go on a pilgrimage, south.


destination: Nick Carroll's backyard for a two week cleansing of the body and mind.
Don't forget the colon.
by offshore1
Sun Jul 22, 2018 12:02 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

I learn something new at Realsurf every day.
I didn't even know horses had hands.
by offshore1
Sat Jul 21, 2018 7:51 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

The good thing about all that misinformation Steve is that it gives you a tremendous advantage over all the cnuts who follow their advice. You're zigging while they're zagging.
by offshore1
Sat Jul 21, 2018 4:29 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Bribie Island Board Riders
Replies: 230
Views: 17777

Re: Bribie Island Board Riders

All with a nice ocean view. https://d1wb0ukcj65cfk.cloudfront.net/restaurant_original/c22e2565-23d5-4e96-855d-db084206a889.jpg Actually I can imagine a scene in which Nicole Kidman is sitting opposite me here : "More Carolina Treet, Nicole?" I suavely offer. "No thank you Offy." she demurely replie...
by offshore1
Sat Jul 21, 2018 3:41 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Waves you've seen but never ridden.
Replies: 13
Views: 418

Re: Waves you've seen but never ridden.

I know exactly what you mean beany, Jefferies, Honolua, Jaws, Shipsterns, Skeleton Bay,there are many, but there's really only one spot that every surfer, whether he's a 12 year old pimply faced California Trestles grommet or a grizzled 250 pound Hawaiian Sunset hellman, hopes to one day, somehow, g...
by offshore1
Sat Jul 21, 2018 3:27 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Bribie Island Board Riders
Replies: 230
Views: 17777

Re: Bribie Island Board Riders

Just needs a bottle of Carolina Treet on the table to top things off.

And, despite appearances to the contrary, I'm no gourmet,
degustation sounds to me a lot like throwing up.
by offshore1
Sat Jul 21, 2018 3:16 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Bribie Island Board Riders
Replies: 230
Views: 17777

Re: Bribie Island Board Riders

Looks delicious. Especially with the view and copious vin.
The Realsurf Inner Rectum has gone so far up its own arse it's now exited and morphed itself into the Realsurf Outer Scrotum.
In short, you fancy fcukers have taken us from arseholes to dickheads.
by offshore1
Sat Jul 21, 2018 1:11 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

steve shearer wrote:
Fri Jul 20, 2018 5:40 pm
...
Here, have a youtoob video of a bubba blade in action instead.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5qMqV5pkIg
Funny, that's exactly how coops does it.
by offshore1
Fri Jul 20, 2018 6:09 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

crabmeat thompson wrote:
Fri Jul 20, 2018 5:54 am
would be better if it was 5 foot bigger.
That's the length of one of Iggy's arms.
by offshore1
Fri Jul 20, 2018 1:00 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

Playful looking day there Iggs.
by offshore1
Thu Jul 19, 2018 10:26 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

I remember the days before fancy surf reports. As our mums drove us to the beach, we'd do the old thumbs up/thumbs down out the window to any returning cars with surfboards on top. Their thumb direction was the long and short of it.

And don't get me started on the wetties we endured.
by offshore1
Thu Jul 19, 2018 5:31 am
Forum: Travel & Health
Topic: Indonesia July school holidays?
Replies: 31
Views: 4017

Re: Indonesia July school holidays?

Beanpole wrote:
Wed Jul 18, 2018 7:47 pm
As long as you had fun.
That's the determinant of the best surfer isn't it? The one having the most kilojoules of fun.
by offshore1
Wed Jul 18, 2018 9:03 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

When it's scotch, definitely.
by offshore1
Tue Jul 17, 2018 7:49 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

ajohnsen wrote:
Tue Jul 17, 2018 7:46 am
Looks to be about 1-2 kilojoules today with a light offjoule coming from the South-Joule.
Joule have to be a bit more specific ajoule.
by offshore1
Tue Jul 17, 2018 7:47 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

Uh oh, It's the Beanpole kiss of death.
Cranked, you are now and forevermore banned from the Realsurf inner rectum.
by offshore1
Tue Jul 17, 2018 7:17 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

Trev wrote:
Tue Jul 17, 2018 7:12 am
offshore1 wrote:
Tue Jul 17, 2018 7:11 am
I thought PN stood for Penis Narcosis.
That too.
Is it painful?
Not too bad once you get used to aligning with the missus's sexual energy level.

One kilojoule.
by offshore1
Tue Jul 17, 2018 7:11 am
Forum: General surf discussion
Topic: Where did you surf today ?
Replies: 18243
Views: 1580087

Re: Where did you surf today ?

I thought PN stood for Penis Narcosis.