why go so short?

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petulance
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Re: why go so short?

Post by petulance » Fri Jan 03, 2014 9:14 am

Hatchnam wrote: and on the flipside, perhaps the reason 'shapers en masse' feel the need to go do damn short is to keep within the confines of the second questionable factor. that of 'board volume to surfer weight'

meaning, if you "weigh X then you've gotta have a board of "Y volume". so by going short, shapers are going too short just to keep within 'Y volume' because of surfer's 'X weight'.
I think some board companies (ahem, CI) have weight to volume guides according to skill level e.g. beginner, intermediate, advanced. Don't ask me how they classify those levels though.

I have gone into surf shops before and the staff would take one look at me and go ... "yeah, I think a fat 5'6" or 5'8" board would suit you". Not that they have ever seen me surfed or know what I can and can't do on a board ...
smnmntll wrote: She's also moderately hot, with a bit of that petulance-approved titless starved whippet look about her but still pretty decent.

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Re: why go so short?

Post by Hatchnam » Fri Jan 03, 2014 9:51 am

this morning was another good example of seeing droves of shitty surfing on way-too-short boards. getting in too late, too flat, stop-start surfing, and not being able to retain a proper line throughout the entire length of the wave.

the only ones retaining speed and momentum and a decent line throughout the entire course of the wave were either really proficient surfers on standard shortboards, or middle-aged pen-pushers on thickened up shortboards or mid-length boards.
steve shearer wrote:full dionysian hand jive body torque
BA wrote:Dropped a frozen 20kg dog on it. The toe is starting to look like Peter Duttons head.

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petulance
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Re: why go so short?

Post by petulance » Fri Jan 03, 2014 10:03 am

lol, that sounds like me on an average session.
smnmntll wrote: She's also moderately hot, with a bit of that petulance-approved titless starved whippet look about her but still pretty decent.

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Re: why go so short?

Post by Hatchnam » Fri Jan 03, 2014 10:31 am

packa wrote:
steve shearer wrote:because short little stumpy planing hulls are far more efficient speed generating devices ...
Correct me.

They do not have to be THAT short to work as planning hulls though?
Exactly
steve shearer wrote:full dionysian hand jive body torque
BA wrote:Dropped a frozen 20kg dog on it. The toe is starting to look like Peter Duttons head.

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Re: why go so short?

Post by Yuke Hunt » Fri Jan 03, 2014 10:46 am

Hey Iggy ... how they hanging ... whats the goss. Been up to visit the family for xmas.
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Re: why go so short?

Post by Beanpole » Fri Jan 03, 2014 4:50 pm

:-D-:
Middle aged pen pusher on a mid length.
That's me.

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Re: why go so short?

Post by Legion » Fri Jan 03, 2014 4:56 pm

...
Last edited by Legion on Sat Feb 22, 2014 1:06 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: why go so short?

Post by Hatchnam » Fri Jan 03, 2014 5:36 pm

Only 83 kg of pen pushing goodness here mate. And prob 6'0 is as short as I'd care to go on a board before detriment outweighs benefit. Saw some goose riding what looked to be a 5'2 this morning. Pure comedy. This stand up booger nonsense is on par with how retarded boards were early to mid 90's. remember that shit ?? Wiggle wiggle flappity flap boggity bog bouncy bounce. :~
steve shearer wrote:full dionysian hand jive body torque
BA wrote:Dropped a frozen 20kg dog on it. The toe is starting to look like Peter Duttons head.

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Re: why go so short?

Post by oldman » Fri Jan 03, 2014 9:27 pm

steve shearer wrote:Oldman is right: if you're a middle aged pen pusher who only surfs weekends and holidays then it doesn't really matter what you surf. As long as there is enough volume to catch waves it'll be fine. And the more waves you catch the more fun you have, hence the SUP phenomena.
Fark it's hard not to read that as possibly the most condescending balls deep smackdown.

Totally not what I was saying. Sup's are the antithesis of where I was going with it, in fact, just another extension, the other way, of the same phenomenon, it's something different, I am a sheep, therefore I must have one. (yes, I understand you are sometimes called 'sheep' Steve, no connection intended, just fits right there)

Yes, if you're a middle age pen pusher, blah blah blah, who has the audacity, nay the total sell-out hypocrisy to value putting food on the table for your wife and children above getting out for every possible surf that is on offer regardless of consequence ( i.e. only a pretend surfer, not a real one) blah blah blah.....

Please Steve, tell me you didn't really mean it that way.

But if you did, you condescending bastard, please accept voluminous personal abuse as follows, blah blah blah .......................

RRon, please note commas, correctly placed to attain emphasis.
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Re: why go so short?

Post by steve shearer » Fri Jan 03, 2014 11:03 pm

Olds, I have nothing but respect for the nameless and unheralded (tender) foot soldiers of the middle/managerial classes.

They are the cornerstone of a functioning western democracy and their devotion to providing rooms with TVs', organic food, modern 4WD's for safe urban motoring and private school education for their kids is nothing but praiseworthy. In fact, you could see it as the pinnacle achievement of human reason, the flower and fruit of a couple of million years of human evolution.

I'm quite happy to clear the line-up for them during holidays so they can enjoy their recreation unmolested, in an environment free of competition and (artificial) hierarchies. They deserve it.
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Re: why go so short?

Post by Jimi » Fri Jan 03, 2014 11:29 pm

Hatchnam wrote:this morning was another good example of seeing droves of shitty surfing on way-too-short boards. getting in too late, too flat, stop-start surfing, and not being able to retain a proper line throughout the entire length of the wave.

the only ones retaining speed and momentum and a decent line throughout the entire course of the wave were either really proficient surfers on standard shortboards, or middle-aged pen-pushers on thickened up shortboards or mid-length boards.
I'm 5ft 9in/70kgs and have both a 5"8, flatter and wider board, and a standard 6"1 shorty, as well as a 6'4. The 6'4 doesn't get much of a go cause it is a dog in anything that isn't at least head high+ and really hollow and powerful, too much rocker for average surf on the east coast. The 6'1 is a pretty good all rounder, goes well from 2 foot to well overhead. But there is no doubt that when the surf is shoulder height or under, and fat, slow or slightly weak, the 5'8 goes much better. Paddles better, gets into waves earlier and easier, and is simply a lot of fun to ride.

What size boards are you talking about when you say "surfing on way-too-short boards. getting in too late, too flat, stop-start surfing, and not being able to retain a proper line throughout the entire length of the wave", cause you have just described the opposite of what my 5'8 does.

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Re: why go so short?

Post by offshore1 » Sat Jan 04, 2014 4:38 am

steve shearer wrote:Olds, I have nothing but respect for the nameless and unheralded (tender) foot soldiers of the middle/managerial classes.

They are the cornerstone of a functioning western democracy and their devotion to providing rooms with TVs', organic food, modern 4WD's for safe urban motoring and private school education for their kids is nothing but praiseworthy. In fact, you could see it as the pinnacle achievement of human reason, the flower and fruit of a couple of million years of human evolution.

I'm quite happy to clear the line-up for them during holidays so they can enjoy their recreation unmolested, in an environment free of competition and (artificial) hierarchies. They deserve it.
wow, that was impressive, condescending and stupendously ironic. well done shearer. well done


ps you know you're attracted to iggy's bum wiggling brazzo mini mal mate...
admit it.

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Re: why go so short?

Post by crabmeat thompson » Sat Jan 04, 2014 5:01 am

Shearer just kicked that one from the sideline. Straight over the black dot.

Possibly the best reply I've ever read here.
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Re: why go so short?

Post by Cuttlefish » Sat Jan 04, 2014 5:26 am

steve shearer wrote:Olds, I have nothing but respect for the nameless and unheralded (tender) foot soldiers of the middle/managerial classes.

They are the cornerstone of a functioning western democracy and their devotion to providing rooms with TVs', organic food, modern 4WD's for safe urban motoring and private school education for their kids is nothing but praiseworthy. In fact, you could see it as the pinnacle achievement of human reason, the flower and fruit of a couple of million years of human evolution.

I'm quite happy to clear the line-up for them during holidays so they can enjoy their recreation unmolested, in an environment free of competition and (artificial) hierarchies. They deserve it.
Hints of Byron in your prose.
I'll not say as to which Byron I refer.
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Re: why go so short?

Post by Hatchnam » Sat Jan 04, 2014 7:23 am

Jimi wrote:I'm 5ft 9in/70kgs ....... the 5'8 goes much better.......... What size boards are you talking about when you say "surfing on way-too-short boards.
you're pretty light, and that board's only an inch shorter than you. and it's flatter, wider, and probably has more volume than your bigger shortboards. so it's bound to go better in smaller weaker stuff..

when i mean 'way too short' i'm taking about riding boards almost up to a foot shorter than your height. which would probably be a blast in waves up to chest high "IF" the wave was either bowling or barrelling from start to finish as you'd be mauling the wave all over, turning like mad.

but if the wave wasn't bowling or barrelling consistently, and had long-dead-flat sections that you needed to link up in between the bowly sections, THEN the lack of length would be a detriment due to reduced surface area and rail length etc and everything you'd need to project thru and 'connect the dots' so to speak.

somebody on the previous pages here nailed it. Slater is 5'9? and can rip on a 5'4. But there's an increasing amount of people out there in the line ups (here in Sydney, Ballina :o, and prob everywhere) who are either fking kidding themselves, or led to believe that YES they too can tear balls out of small slop on a board that comes up to their chin just like Slater et. al can. :roll:

everything in moderation. too long can be a problem. too short can be a problem. but as i said from pg.1 there's (what i believe) to be an erronous trend of going TOO short to be practical for most applications at present.
steve shearer wrote:full dionysian hand jive body torque
BA wrote:Dropped a frozen 20kg dog on it. The toe is starting to look like Peter Duttons head.

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Re: why go so short?

Post by Beanpole » Sat Jan 04, 2014 8:07 am

There's been a few waves around here lately and I seem to notice heaps of people simply floating over the back of waves they are trying to catch because the volume of their boards is condensed into a little fat bundle. If they do catch the wave it's right at the last minute and they are propelled very rapidly down the face while trying to get to their feet. Hey they can't surf that good anyway and they struggle against the rip in a clumsy fashion on their corky little floaters.

I stopped riding my relatively short, relatively corky little number a while ago and gee it's nice to slide in smoothly and enjoy the ride.

So congratulations to the style masters who have sold these pups to the masses it means just like the few backpackers I see out on old skinny banana boards someone has sold them that they have Buckleys of catching a decent wave and riding it. :B

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Re: why go so short?

Post by DV8 » Sat Jan 04, 2014 8:37 pm

One thing this short , shorter and shortest revolution has done is confuse the fcuk out of
me with what " a standard shorty " is anymore.
Every shaper throughout their catalogue has the usual " ride this 2-4inches smaller, 1/2 wider than your regular shorty".

My regular shorty used to be a 6"6 20yr ago, now I think :-? it's a 6"4 , and for the most part nowadays I can easily
get away with riding a 6"2 up to 4ft ........ so has that now become my standard regular shorty ???

Anyone else confused :?: :?:

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Re: why go so short?

Post by Beerfan » Sun Jan 05, 2014 7:56 am

steve shearer wrote:Olds, I have nothing but respect for the nameless and unheralded (tender) foot soldiers of the middle/managerial classes.

They are the cornerstone of a functioning western democracy and their devotion to providing rooms with TVs', organic food, modern 4WD's for safe urban motoring and private school education for their kids is nothing but praiseworthy. In fact, you could see it as the pinnacle achievement of human reason, the flower and fruit of a couple of million years of human evolution.

I'm quite happy to clear the line-up for them during holidays so they can enjoy their recreation unmolested, in an environment free of competition and (artificial) hierarchies. They deserve it.

And they would mostly be happy to only spend a small time there. Because for all the romanticism of small coastal town life, the reality of boredom, depression, substance abuse, unemployment, welfare dependence and a general running from any kind of contribution to society is much more tolerated in those kind of places. The longer you stay, the more obvious it becomes.
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