a.d.d to aspergers syndrom

[gibber]

Just stumbled onto this thread...jeezz

Was only thinking the other day about digger, haven't seen his posts for a while and was wondering where the hell he was at.

Trev or Fong, if you guys see him tell him my thoughts are with him. As some of you know, my wife and i have a 17yr old with ASD who has been a great challenge to raise but we are getting there day by day.My wife is very active in the ASD and aspergers netweork so if he would like some local support get him to contact me.
Also, i was diagnosed as being aspy a while ago and can pass on some anecdotes from life if he is keen to hear me waffle on.

anyway, let him know i'm here if he needs to chat.

[ric_vidal]

Gibber, did you watch The Undateables last night?

One participant in the show was 37 yr male, out for his second date in 20 years.

Stirred a lot of emotions, my son is 24 and whilst perhaps more adept in some areas than the guy in the show, is just as impacted socially.

[gibber]

No Ric i missed it.
I had to work on my social skills from day one. I was a bit slow at getting the social skills thing but after plenty of work i found a way to read the signs, was kind of like a 'new thing' to get my self embroiled in.
Thats the only way i could put it in context. Was like my new obsession.
Really though, for me it felt like a new science and that is what gets me interested in anything really.
Talk with you son Ric and see if you can tap into the part of his brain that likes to obsess on new things and plant the seed, it will germinate with the right kind of love and attention.

Remember though, aspergers wasn't even a known disorder when i was growing up, I was just a bit 'different' and didn't really get people my own age, i would constantly search out older people to learn from by watching them and then parroting their behaviours. It helped me to be the person i turned out to be

If i can help mate let me know

[ric_vidal]

Remember though, aspergers wasn't even a known disorder when i was growing up, I was just a bit 'different' and didn't really get people my own age, i would constantly search out older people to learn from by watching them and then parroting their behaviours. It helped me to be the person i turned out to be

If i can help mate let me know

Thanks Gibber, you have obviously managed it well, and must admit I only skim read your post so hadn't pick up on the part about yourself.

Not sure that he is that driven at this point in time, but who knows. Getting info can be like extracting teeth, but you always sense when things are amiss. He has his routines and that is comfortable (for him), we won't talk about the impact on others.

[diggerdickson]

Hey gibber, its been a long time for me mate, I was struggling with home life with my kids so I just dropped off the scene for a while, Im the only family member without aspergeries so sometimes I feel like im the one missing out on the gifts this brings.

I sorta hide whenever I get negative influence in my life and that was happening unfortunately through this site and others so I thought instead of fighting, just leave for a while.

At the homefront its still a daily battle, our boy noah is not on any meds and has been extremely depressed for a while now, he also has anxiety attacks to go with it. While my girl has also suffered greatly from depression, it seems to run in the family

We now homeschool our kids, wife is the fulltime stay at home mum, we protect them as much as possible but take them to as many groups as possible for their devolopement.

I struggle to get along with my boy, who is only 7, he gets extremely stressed whenever I show affection to tracy and fights break out. We continually get forced to move every year in the rental market, and being that i missed out on land due to not having enough assests I went and bought a 40 foot school bus to live in, at least this will give my kids some stability in knowing that each night their bedroom will always be there for them without the worry of moving anymore.

Noah did cool off with the swimming, it seems his thing is to fight against the world and hopefully he will grow out of it. I spend as much time as possible at home now helping tracy look after them. My girl is beautiful , she just cannot handle crowds and is becoming more aspy withdrawn from kids her own age as the months go on and keep rolling on and on. Luckily she has one really good friend she visits regulary to get away from Noah and has play time with her

Im hoping things get better for my kids, espically noah, we are looking for visits for him to specialists and im thinking once bus done up and decked out, save just a tad of money, then take a 2 to 3 year tirp around oz, I dont intend to live to work, only work to live, and if I cant give my kids financial help then I will give them incredible memories of parents who were just out there and took tehm around australia not caring of the costs it would take on their job security or their financial plan when they got older in life.

I hate my material possesions and the greed it can bring on, so im selling the lot, geez insounding rather aspy hey, sometimes i think im cracking up and other times I think Im onto something just really special, simplify my life is the trip im on at the moment

[otway1949]

Good to hear from you Digger, one thought strikes some resonance with me in regard to what you plan.

Please make sure that both you and your wife get your lives nourished too.
See that you get pleasure outside and beyond those you get from seeing your kids flourish. Even if it is a little surf time caught here and there.
A courageous plan,hat's off to you!

[ric_vidal]

Diggs, good of you stick your head back in and to read how you are processing it all.

Sounds tough and it is. Some of us even understand, not that that makes the plight any easier.

Don't be afraid to seek help from any and ALL sources.

[diggerdickson]

Diggs, good of you stick your head back in and to read how you are processing it all.

Sounds tough and it is. Some of us even understand, not that that makes the plight any easier.

Don't be afraid to seek help from any and ALL sources.

Cheers ric, Its been hell mate, one that dont end, but at times there are beautiful patches of sunlight like this morning when I went down to the oval with my boy and our dog to just throw a tennis ball and I got to listen to my boy laugh for a hour

Ive been sliding down the slope again lately, without relising what is happening Im finding myself just crying when a customer has a issue that needs sorting or they are aggressive, and I get on a incredible high sometimes when I turn up to work, Im all over the f@#$ing place.

I know I need to see a doc again, im trying to support my wife and help with the kidss, be a dad who brings home the bacon, and have something secure for my kids each night, but ive failed in that Ive tried, but failed essentially, now I cant manage my own stress levels, only my wifes.

My australian manager popped in to tell me ive been behaving manically at work, they love my work ethic but they are worried which one of me will turn up each day. Any chance of progress is a shot deal for me as i cant handle it anymore, ive been told to see the doc as soon as i can to get on stronger medicine, i know I need to surf more, just waiting for the waves to come back.

I know my thoughts are not the norm that people go through, at least im smart enough to know, that something is wrong, i feel ive cracked under the pressure, just need to hang in to pay off the car loan, then set the bus up, and then take it from there, I feel my family needs me more than ever, stuff nows what I will do for work in the future, but I need to reduce the pressure on me and help more at home before I totally lose the plot, my family needs me for a while yet.

[otway1949]

Dig, mate while you can review yourself like this you are still working with insight, dealing with the hell ( and it is) seems to go on and on, sometimes it seems like any other problem is so petty in comparison.

Dig, hang on to the patches of sunshine and that rare surf when it happens,
see the doc too I don't see failure in you just that length of struggle,
Sort of like you don't drown until you stop treading water.

See if setting little achievable goals to do bit by bit to lessen the mountain you might see in front of you.
Appreciate that you have done amazing stuff to survive upto this day, take breath and you know you can do it again.
I'll Pm you my home phone and you can use it if you wish.

Cheers digger, you are doing better than you believe!

[ric_vidal]

Diggs, whilst it sounds like you might be down you are also very conscious of what is going on, that to me is a good thing.

Get the help, keep plodding mate.

Talk to Otway, he and his good wife have helped me, though I am still seeking.

[daryl]

A Cycling magazine re

ports bike riding's as good as Ritalin.

Millions of kids in America 'got' ADHD right at the same time schools pulled funding from PE to college testpreparation

[daryl]

http://www.bicycling.com/news/featured- ... my-ritalin

Exciting distinction from regular sport or physical exercise fitness, is how it's described he would be so-called 'distracted' when someone passed by the classroom door, much like competitive sport with the jostling for position for example like bike riding in a peloton, or lane swimming...

Quite UNLIKE the bizarre insinuations that adhd ausperger's et al. act inhumanly, machine-like without standard emotions when this suggests a much tighter bond to others, even although in a competitive sense

[diggerdickson]

went to doc last friday, finally got around to it So I have deep depression and dont feel like going outside and it takes all my energy to do so and talk to people, jee wizz, tell me something I dont know

The good thing to take out of the meeting is that he is taking me seriously, getting physc help now starting next monday in the docs office, will work out issues like how to cope better with my stress levels I hope. Will be going on medicine as cant see a way out of my feelings as sometimes so up its not funny like today, and then a emotional crying wreck, can happen 3 to 5 times in a 24 hour period. Not sure what medicine as what im on dont work no more and my add has really ramped up and is controlling me. So will work that out with physc.

In the meantime, till next monday im praticing to fake it really good, keep turning up to work, and then get home and fake at home till im right. My missus understands so all cool there.

Hopefully soon this spiral will stop, it seems I get better then the next time is even worse, like a vicous circle that never ends, so ive decided to break the circle and man up, drink some cement and seek a permanent fix, no decisions will be made by me while im this way, once im clear headed then lifestyle decisions may be made to free up my family.

To all, cheers for thoughts and messages, I really appreciate it, but im sorta keeping low still, have for a long long time and just dealing with the doc, yes my kids have aspergiers, so what, they are so cool as fong said, its just how I deal with them whilst I am like I am is the main struggle.

there will be no checking out for me, im in it for the long haul. I plan to surf wa one day and the bluff, get a real nice 6,8 channelled pin tail and get barrelled of my nuts. It was awesome to see ya fong and hope your shaping goes well mate. Im now planning on how I will continue to shape whilst living in the bus and have a few ideas

[Nick Carroll]

You sound like a courageous man diggs, all the best.

[swvic]

Yeah, what he just said

Might be surprised by the reaction if you don't fake anything though. We're much better than we used to be. Stigma is disappearing

[alakaboo]

Nice article, Daryl.
I essentially self-medicated with exercise to get through the last couple of years of high school. Dropped music and ramped up sport, everything got easier.
Waterpolo at 5:45, swimming at 7, weights or skills at lunch, swimming at 3:30, homework on the bus home, waterpolo at 7:30.

Strength to you and your family, Digger.
Courageous to be writing about it, as much as living through it. Hope it helps a bit.

[steve shearer]

All the best Digger.
Don't forget to appreciate the simplest things mate.

[swvic]

Too far south for physical help, but be happy to contribute some coin