It's all documented here skip http://www.roystuart.biz/2010/01/satire ... magic.htmlskipper wrote:Roy, That was Gold.
Nice to see your fun side.
But could you unpack this one please :?
Roy_Stewart wrote:
Needless to say we had a ball, especially surfing a 13'9" 70 pounder on the Manu Bay ledge in sizeable low tide conditions in the Open division, and sliding the point in front of the entire Saturday crowd when heats were postponed due to no surf.
the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
Moderators: jimmy, collnarra, PeepeelaPew, Butts, beach_defender, Shari, Forum Moderators
- godsavetheking
- Duke Status
- Posts: 11128
- Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2012 7:47 am
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
-
- barnacle
- Posts: 1540
- Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2010 4:39 pm
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
Lol yes the nationals report is true though.
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
The bit about 'having a ball'....'sizeable low tide'....and 'no surf'..
- Animal_Chin
- Local
- Posts: 748
- Joined: Thu Feb 19, 2009 6:55 pm
- Location: G'town
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
I just want to know who 'we' are.
-
- barnacle
- Posts: 1540
- Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2010 4:39 pm
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
skipper wrote:The bit about 'having a ball'....'sizeable low tide'....and 'no surf'..
Plenty went down over the three weeks, too much for one post.
Anyway I'd wrecked my favourite 10'4" and only had two boards the other being the 13'9" Dragon, so when the swell came up overnight I had no choice. The road had washed out overnight so I had to carry the board a couple of k down the road on my head ( 30kg ) to the ledge for my heat ( I entered in 6 divisions). It was low tide and ragged on the ledge at about triple overhead, I paddled out early, and immediately dropped in on a competitor in the heat that was still running, i'm not used to formal comps and the animal took over, convincing me that i'd heard the hooter for my heat or that my watch said 'go' no matter where the hands were. :?
Caught three waves in my heat and made them all although I did lose it halfway through on one when deciding to cut back, forgetting that when the ledge is big the foam ball rolls up behind one deceptively... surfaced to see the 14 feet of redwood getting air repeatedly, doing big lazy flips in the air all the way down to the boat ramp.
It was sketchy, with multiple ledges and double ups.. the plan was to get in nice and early, which i did on one, thinking i was sweet until the whole wave below me yawned open and the massive board dropped vertically ( no pulling the nose up on that beast). I rolled on to the inside rail in desperation, expecting the worst, but opened my eyes to find that I'd pulled in to a big gnarly pocket . good fun all round with only three of us out.
On the saturday the semis and finals of the open mens were scheduled, with a big crowd and small waves. The heats were suspended mid nmorning as none of the competitors could catch anything. I seized the moment and paddled out, picking off the tiny waves and cruising right down the point as they reeled off at knee high. After a few of those the judges order me out of the water, called the comp back on but once again no one could catch anything what a coup.
Had a great longboard heat in shoulder high surf, the others got rides about 40 metres up to the judges stand, where they faded out, but on my tunnel finned ten four i slid through the flat section and got long rides with a doozy of an inside section, all of which was behind the judges stand... the waves went right down to the beer tent where one of the local glassers who was barman called out that I'd "definitely won that one" , he was wrong i was last, not only could the judges not see most of the rides due to it being behind the stand, i didn't do any longboard moves, plus I had interference on two counts from some clown called R Rust dropping in behind, and me not pulling out, dropping in behind cuts no ice with me.
We also had some epic tussles on land as disgraced ex local doctor and drug dealer as well as self appointed Roy enemy Andrew Mcnab kept ringing the council to tell them to kick us out of town as 'troublemakers'.. he would stand on the shore ranting about me wearing a yellow wetsuit consequently i had daily stand offs re. parking my bus, trailer, and dodge truck and we had to shift camp constantly.
'we' consisted of myself, wife, 8 children, 3 dogs ( bull terriers,one being a registered dangerous dog) 4 cats, and several birds including a hawk and a magpie which i bought for $5 from a local maori during the comp who was about to kill it for not being a native .
On Christmas day we broke down on the point road due to fuel pump issues, which caused a near riot as we crawled at 2mph with me head down under the engine cover fiddling with the fuel line clamp on the newly installed electric fuel pump which either delivered way to much or f all without apparent rhyme or reason. Changed it for the old mechanical one on the side of the road. the bus could only be started with an old tractor crank handle ( 300 cubic inch 6 cylinder petrol ) which was par for the course but a tad stressful with fuel delivery issues and huge queues of meth soaked revellers wanting a punch up for holding up the traffic.
If Mcnab had known that none of the vehicles were registered or warranted, were using borrowed number plates due to having been deregistered, and that i had no heavy traffic licence he would have had a field day, but with a new coat of house paint they all looked pretty spiffing so thankfully he didn't think of it.
We'd wrecked two tyres on the trailer on the way to Raglan as wife who was towing it behind the dodge ( no driver's licence ) kept cutting corners and smashing wheels into kerbs. With great forethought i bought three rims and tyres for the trip home, thinking that they might be sufficient to get us there.
I was mistaken, going around a roundabout in Ngaruawahia the trailer met another kerb and the tube started to bulge out of a hole in the sidewall of the left trailer tyre. I decided to change it in the karangahake gorge but unfortunately none of the three spares fitted. We got home to Mount Maunganui on the rim, down to walking speed in the last stretch.
Other notable incidents included my friend Marcus firing up a huge joint ( I don't partake) in the bus and then immediately passing out. We thought he was dead. He woke up about 20 minutes later and said "I thought I was dying" then fired up the joint again.
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
That settles it. He can stay.
- Animal_Chin
- Local
- Posts: 748
- Joined: Thu Feb 19, 2009 6:55 pm
- Location: G'town
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
tl;drRoy_Stewart wrote:skipper wrote:The bit about 'having a ball'....'sizeable low tide'....and 'no surf'..
Plenty went down over the three weeks, too much for one post.
Anyway I'd wrecked my favourite 10'4" and only had two boards the other being the 13'9" Dragon, so when the swell came up overnight I had no choice. The road had washed out overnight so I had to carry the board a couple of k down the road on my head ( 30kg ) to the ledge for my heat ( I entered in 6 divisions). It was low tide and ragged on the ledge at about triple overhead, I paddled out early, and immediately dropped in on a competitor in the heat that was still running, i'm not used to formal comps and the animal took over, convincing me that i'd heard the hooter for my heat or that my watch said 'go' no matter where the hands were. :?
Caught three waves in my heat and made them all although I did lose it halfway through on one when deciding to cut back, forgetting that when the ledge is big the foam ball rolls up behind one deceptively... surfaced to see the 14 feet of redwood getting air repeatedly, doing big lazy flips in the air all the way down to the boat ramp.
It was sketchy, with multiple ledges and double ups.. the plan was to get in nice and early, which i did on one, thinking i was sweet until the whole wave below me yawned open and the massive board dropped vertically ( no pulling the nose up on that beast). I rolled on to the inside rail in desperation, expecting the worst, but opened my eyes to find that I'd pulled in to a big gnarly pocket . good fun all round with only three of us out.
On the saturday the semis and finals of the open mens were scheduled, with a big crowd and small waves. The heats were suspended mid nmorning as none of the competitors could catch anything. I seized the moment and paddled out, picking off the tiny waves and cruising right down the point as they reeled off at knee high. After a few of those the judges order me out of the water, called the comp back on but once again no one could catch anything what a coup.
Had a great longboard heat in shoulder high surf, the others got rides about 40 metres up to the judges stand, where they faded out, but on my tunnel finned ten four i slid through the flat section and got long rides with a doozy of an inside section, all of which was behind the judges stand... the waves went right down to the beer tent where one of the local glassers who was barman called out that I'd "definitely won that one" , he was wrong i was last, not only could the judges not see most of the rides due to it being behind the stand, i didn't do any longboard moves, plus I had interference on two counts from some clown called R Rust dropping in behind, and me not pulling out, dropping in behind cuts no ice with me.
We also had some epic tussles on land as disgraced ex local doctor and drug dealer as well as self appointed Roy enemy Andrew Mcnab kept ringing the council to tell them to kick us out of town as 'troublemakers'.. he would stand on the shore ranting about me wearing a yellow wetsuit consequently i had daily stand offs re. parking my bus, trailer, and dodge truck and we had to shift camp constantly.
'we' consisted of myself, wife, 8 children, 3 dogs ( bull terriers,one being a registered dangerous dog) 4 cats, and several birds including a hawk and a magpie which i bought for $5 from a local maori during the comp who was about to kill it for not being a native .
On Christmas day we broke down on the point road due to fuel pump issues, which caused a near riot as we crawled at 2mph with me head down under the engine cover fiddling with the fuel line clamp on the newly installed electric fuel pump which either delivered way to much or f all without apparent rhyme or reason. Changed it for the old mechanical one on the side of the road. the bus could only be started with an old tractor crank handle ( 300 cubic inch 6 cylinder petrol ) which was par for the course but a tad stressful with fuel delivery issues and huge queues of meth soaked revellers wanting a punch up for holding up the traffic.
If Mcnab had known that none of the vehicles were registered or warranted, were using borrowed number plates due to having been deregistered, and that i had no heavy traffic licence he would have had a field day, but with a new coat of house paint they all looked pretty spiffing so thankfully he didn't think of it.
We'd wrecked two tyres on the trailer on the way to Raglan as wife who was towing it behind the dodge ( no driver's licence ) kept cutting corners and smashing wheels into kerbs. With great forethought i bought three rims and tyres for the trip home, thinking that they might be sufficient to get us there.
I was mistaken, going around a roundabout in Ngaruawahia the trailer met another kerb and the tube started to bulge out of a hole in the sidewall of the left trailer tyre. I decided to change it in the karangahake gorge but unfortunately none of the three spares fitted. We got home to Mount Maunganui on the rim, down to walking speed in the last stretch.
Other notable incidents included my friend Marcus firing up a huge joint ( I don't partake) in the bus and then immediately passing out. We thought he was dead. He woke up about 20 minutes later and said "I thought I was dying" then fired up the joint again.
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
thanks for the story roy, I'm glad I asked. you was robbed! and as usual unappreciated for all you do for the grand sport of curl-riding..
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
"Marcus ..... on the bus. "
That Albanian stuff will do it.
That Albanian stuff will do it.
-
- barnacle
- Posts: 1540
- Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2010 4:39 pm
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
The competition goal was to cause maximum effect while scoring the minimum number of points (i.e. one point per wave).
It's a measure of efficiency, the buddha palm of surfing comps.
It's a measure of efficiency, the buddha palm of surfing comps.
- kreepykrawly
- Owl status
- Posts: 4181
- Joined: Wed Dec 07, 2005 10:03 pm
- Location: AWAY FROM SURF CAMPS
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
I wish UFC would take over the ASP and turn it into one huge Darwinian filter system.
Too many pigeon chested saps in charge.
I would like to see the Bra Boys in control.
Too many pigeon chested saps in charge.
I would like to see the Bra Boys in control.
-
- barnacle
- Posts: 1684
- Joined: Mon Nov 24, 2008 8:01 pm
- Location: Devil Gate Drive
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
that was quite a story there roy. thanks.
sometime i think i should get off my ass and travel a bit more than the 200 metre walk to the crappy local. but after hearing about your travails, maybe i'll stay put.
sometime i think i should get off my ass and travel a bit more than the 200 metre walk to the crappy local. but after hearing about your travails, maybe i'll stay put.
-
- barnacle
- Posts: 1540
- Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2010 4:39 pm
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
Cheers PP, actually I'm a stay at home local at heart, Raglan is in my patch though so I stage a raid now and then. The last one was amusing socially as well, don't ask ...purple pyramids wrote:that was quite a story there roy. thanks.
sometime i think i should get off my ass and travel a bit more than the 200 metre walk to the crappy local. but after hearing about your travails, maybe i'll stay put.
Right now I'm living inland an hour from my home break, a stint at 200 metres would be great. It can get too much after a while though.
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
how is this the biggest story in surfing in 300 years?
there are about 50 people on this earth that give a shit about the asp.
the pro surfers, NC, wabbit, and prob those yanks on that American radio program.
pro surfing could stop tomorrow and the people that enjoy riding waves will still be riding waves.
there are about 50 people on this earth that give a shit about the asp.
the pro surfers, NC, wabbit, and prob those yanks on that American radio program.
pro surfing could stop tomorrow and the people that enjoy riding waves will still be riding waves.
Oscar Wilde - "I am not young enough to know everything"
-
- Huey's Right Hand
- Posts: 26515
- Joined: Tue Apr 05, 2005 9:29 am
- Location: Newport Beach
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
Yes that is true.
Yet surfing for most surfers in the world would not look anything like it does had the whole project, the whole idea of surfers trying to do their best in the public eye, not been enacted over the past 40 odd years.
And given the numbers who view the major events online and via cable tv, and the level of commentary even on this site, I am sure there is a lot more than 50 people paying attention.
I spose the bigger issue is that it seems like the people involved in the current decision making processes around the ASP Tour really have no grasp of how much is on the line here. They are thinking just like you Marcus, they are thinking they're the only people in the picture. Ie their personal interests in the moment are the main game.
It just isn't the case. None of us engage in surfing in a vacuum, we're influenced by a vast web of stuff pouring down on us, heroes and performances, design ideas and trends, ideas about what the best sorts of waves are to ride, and deeper and less visible stuff like the way our sport interacts with our nationhood, and how the trend makers in our local area have chosen to move with the times.
Still maybe the visionaries, the people who can see beyond all that and grasp the potential future of the sport, are now largely in our past, and surfing will just sorta gently devolve in the years to come, for lack of a Wabbit or a Greenough or whoever. Maybe we're all just better off pursuing our personal interests and finally forever surrendering the old communal idea about surfing, that we were all engaged in something bigger than ourselves.
Yet surfing for most surfers in the world would not look anything like it does had the whole project, the whole idea of surfers trying to do their best in the public eye, not been enacted over the past 40 odd years.
And given the numbers who view the major events online and via cable tv, and the level of commentary even on this site, I am sure there is a lot more than 50 people paying attention.
I spose the bigger issue is that it seems like the people involved in the current decision making processes around the ASP Tour really have no grasp of how much is on the line here. They are thinking just like you Marcus, they are thinking they're the only people in the picture. Ie their personal interests in the moment are the main game.
It just isn't the case. None of us engage in surfing in a vacuum, we're influenced by a vast web of stuff pouring down on us, heroes and performances, design ideas and trends, ideas about what the best sorts of waves are to ride, and deeper and less visible stuff like the way our sport interacts with our nationhood, and how the trend makers in our local area have chosen to move with the times.
Still maybe the visionaries, the people who can see beyond all that and grasp the potential future of the sport, are now largely in our past, and surfing will just sorta gently devolve in the years to come, for lack of a Wabbit or a Greenough or whoever. Maybe we're all just better off pursuing our personal interests and finally forever surrendering the old communal idea about surfing, that we were all engaged in something bigger than ourselves.
- steve shearer
- BUTTONMEISTER
- Posts: 44827
- Joined: Mon Oct 13, 2008 8:20 pm
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
Nick Carroll wrote:
Still maybe the visionaries, the people who can see beyond all that and grasp the potential future of the sport, are now largely in our past, and surfing will just sorta gently devolve in the years to come, for lack of a Wabbit or a Greenough or whoever. Maybe we're all just better off pursuing our personal interests and finally forever surrendering the old communal idea about surfing, that we were all engaged in something bigger than ourselves.
I like the gist of the ideas expressed here, but are you saying that Pro Surfing was part of a "communal idea" about surfing?
I know Greenough would be horrified to somehow be implicated in the rubric of that statement.
If anything, it's precisely the lack of that communal aspect or over-arching narrative that the Sport of surfing has lacked.
It had something with the Dream Tour but as that concept was thrown on the pyre of bottom-line pressure and disengenous marketing double-speak (Rod Brooks saying going back to G-Land was a retrospective move then announcing New York, pretty much anything that comes out of Bob Hurleys mouth) disaffection has become entrenched.
Still, people watch because it's good entertainment.............
I'm pretty flabbergasted at the lack of scrutiny put on the deal and just the coverage of Pro surfing in general.
2 journos as far as I can tell covered Portugal. Doherty did some nice sports writing but between him and Pruett there was zero fresh interviews ....all we got were recycled ASP soundbites.
Pretty backyard stuff.
I want Nightclub Dwight dead in his grave I want the nice-nice up in blazes
-
- barnacle
- Posts: 1540
- Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2010 4:39 pm
Re: the biggest surf story in 300 yrs & nc ...
Right, watching the members of the self proclaimed 'surfing tribe' cartel have a group grope, and gaining anonymous membership by buying the T shirt as prescribed by the scientific marketing of depression techniques is such a warm fuzzy sharing experience I'm sure.Nick Carroll wrote:
Maybe we're all just better off pursuing our personal interests and finally forever surrendering the old communal idea about surfing, that we were all engaged in something bigger than ourselves.
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 78 guests