Summer 2013-'14

[8]

Youse reckon the GFS from Friday onwards will deliver anything?

http://www.weatherzone.com.au/models/?l ... aus&mt=gfs

[steve shearer]

There will b surf. First day of the swell on the pass bank is gunna b mindless.

Will you be out there?

\
Hell yes old fruit!!

I've got a fifteen hour session planned for the first day of the swell. In the water at five with a camelbak loaded with gatorade and mashed up banana, two to three laps an hour until eight pm. One wave per lap. Maybe a half hour repose under a pandanus when the midday cock crows.
I'm pumped, I'm pysched. I've never felt such joy and jubilation over an upcoming surf session. I've pre-loaded the bones with calcium, potassium, magnesium, caesium, plutonium and other essential minerals. Every organ is primed, particularly the liver and pancreas. The liver is calm, full of repose and forgiveness. It can stomach a million drop-ins, if you'll pardon the garbled metaphor. The duodenum itself is quivering in an anticipatory peristaltic paso doble with the small intestine. It's ready for plankton, seaweed, shark caca and any other nutrients which can be harvested from the passing current.

The neural pathways are perfect. I don't even have to think: Move this limb and it happens.It just happens!!! How the fcuk does that work? What mind makes those decisions? There's no need for mental formations of any stripe, colour or flavour. The hard problem of consciousness solved inter alia reality impinging. Pure existence. Like a motionless predator drifting in the universal current. The patience is measured in geological time. Epochs will pass then Bam!!!Whap!!!Pow!!! I'll strike like a cobra. Like a tiger in the night. Finding the jugular each and every time.

Some moustachioed walrus with a mistress and a string of holiday rental properties will be distracted by profit and loss, and Bam!!!- too slow sucker- and I'm flying down the line. Craven worm on a floating piece of plastic, phantasmogorical blip in the space-time continuum, execrable phenomenological caca shat out of the interpenetrating play of universal forces and forms.

I'm doing nothing. Making no concessions to fifty years of so-called performance surfing. Straight ahead adolph in perfect trim. Now waving my arms in the most distasteful display of ostentatious affectation. Hipsters are horrified; they are filled with murderous disgust. To a man, woman and child they would slit my throat with their hand foiled greenough stage four fins, bludgeon me to extinction with the bladey railed hulls of their resin tinted custom built mid lengths. The emotion becomes contagious and a mass vomiting event ensues, bringing in schools of hungry baitfish, which shower in and out of backlit spinning tubes like shards of glass. This is the most beautiful moment of my life and I wish to share it.

Six south african racist ranchers from the high veldt of the eastern cape come plummeting onto the wave on chinese pop-out mals; plenty of room boys. Lakka bru.
Five vegan butch lesbians with stinky vaginas on yellow hire boards are cutting the green. Show us ya tits we all yell and barely make the section dodging haymakers.
Four blond teutons on too short mini mals are grunting with germanic intention and paddling with industrial efficiency to join the wave. "You do it like this" instructs one. Nazi punks fcuk off I scream and high five them on the way through.
Three middle aged australian women still intoxicated with a post divorce sense of sensual/spiritual awakening imbued to the point of self obsession on a recent trip to Ubud are wildly flailing at frangipannied Mctavishs to ride the wave. I love you all!!! "we don't need anyones love we have our own self love" weeee.
Two work-a-daddy software salesmen on seven-S monster fishes with poor posture and disappointed countenances miss the wave due to weak paddling and dissipated will. "better go in Rod, Louise wants to go shopping this afternoon" one says. To hell with Louise Rod!!! Become part and parcel of this transparent eyeball. We are nothing; we see all!!!
One balding merchant banker in a cap is sweeping furiously on a SUP in an attempt to catch this wave. No Monseiur. Stand down and cease paddling before I board your vessel and terminate your command with extreme prejudice.

And so on and so forth until glorious sun winks from between the twin peaks of Mt Chincogan and the golden milky light slowly dims from the surface of the water.

I am ready to surf the Pass Braithwaite.

Sir.

[steve shearer]

thanks Matty, don't know where that came from.

[Grooter]

Fcuk its hot down here right now

[steve shearer]

Bit of Jean Paul Satre.

The Daily Telegraph.

[OddaP]

I idly whiled the short drive home today considering taking a bolt up there if I can time an RDO. Decided I would go all 'Boo and ride my 6'8 to try to beat the crowd. High five this old timer as well if I get there Steve.

The models are starting to come closer together

[crabmeat thompson]

Two work-a-daddy software salesmen on seven-S monster fishes with poor posture and disappointed countenances miss the wave due to weak paddling and dissipated will. "better go in Rod, Louise wants to go shopping this afternoon" one says. To hell with Louise Rod!!!

No Monseiur. Stand down and cease paddling before I board your vessel and terminate your command with extreme prejudice.

... and here I was expecting you to say no.

[Donweather]

The models are starting to come closer together

Are they? I'd say GFS and EC are still fairly apart for Saturday/Sunday forecast with respect to the positioning and deepening of the tropical low.

[Beanpole]

Do you think your diet is giving you the edge, Steve?
You seem to have got your hunger back

Sorry, to hear its hot down there, groots, cause today was magnificent in Sydney.

My question is really how it's lookin for the long weekend?
Maybe down south. Maybe a bit north.

[Donweather]

Ok now EC is looking more in line with GFS!!!

[crabmeat thompson]

It's gonna come.

... but so might the winds?

[Nick Carroll]

Eddie.

[el rancho]

the north kirra paddle out to protest the terminal will be interesting

[steve shearer]

Eddie.

proximity<1000nm. Check.

Large gyre with occluded low pressure systems tracking towards Hawaii. Check.

Captured fetch. Check.

Windspeed. Gale to Severe gale. Question mark. You wanna see storm force before you book it.

Still, it'll be the biggest event of the season.

Local winds as the head of the fetch noses towards Hawaii could be problematic. Although it could be light and variable land and sea breezes if it disrupts trades without bringing in too much synoptic wind.

[OddaP]

The models are starting to come closer together

Are they? I'd say GFS and EC are still fairly apart for Saturday/Sunday forecast with respect to the positioning and deepening of the tropical low.

With respect more to not bank busteroony time I should've said. But looks good now.

[steve shearer]

haven't seen it Merks but it's just a WW3 animation, nothing new.

Keep Mon and Tues free.

[Nick Carroll]

Eddie.

proximity<1000nm. Check.

Large gyre with occluded low pressure systems tracking towards Hawaii. Check.

Captured fetch. Check.

Windspeed. Gale to Severe gale. Question mark. You wanna see storm force before you book it.

Still, it'll be the biggest event of the season.

Local winds as the head of the fetch noses towards Hawaii could be problematic. Although it could be light and variable land and sea breezes if it disrupts trades without bringing in too much synoptic wind.

Yeah the Bays best in variable winds

Gonna watch for one more day. The dateline's the marker for me, if she keeps coming across the dateline then ka boom.